What Miss USA taught me....

I watched my eight year old daughter's face as the pageant contestants walked across the stage. Her expression was that of amusement and curiosity...I could only imagine what was going through her head at that moment. For an eight year old--some what of a tom boy-- sitting almost next to Miss USA this evening may have been somewhat of a culture shock. From our morning battles to brush teeth and comb hair to seeing perfectly poised beauty queens on a gleaming stage, I was secretly hoping the evening would inspire her to be 'more of a little lady'. And at the end of the night, I got exactly what I wanted.

Having sponsored Miss Maryland USA for the past two years, I've learned a lot more about the competitors than I ever thought I would. Sitting in the audience tonight watching the girls perfectly poised in their evening wear and swim wear, I had so much admiration for what it takes these women to be on that stage. So many people have the misconception that it's just a 'see who's prettier' contest. In reality, these women work their asses off. From diets, workouts, walking, posing, gowns, teeth, hair, wardrobes, tanning, nails, skin care, choreographed routines, accessorizing, sponsorships, countless interviews, pre pageant training, and so much more...these brave women have fought hard to be where they are. Not to mention that they are all educated, productive citizens in our community. The winner of tonight's Miss Maryland USA 2012 tonight graduated top of her class from UCLA and was an All American volley ball player...another was a scientist at NASA...while someone else was a partner in a law firm. They are strong, intelligent, beautiful women who are all competing to represent the state of Maryland in a positive and vibrant way. I learned this last year when I attended the pre competition meetings with the girls. They were given the rules of the competition which included being sweet, gracious, and respectful to every single person that they meet. To always be put together and ready for anything, and most of all that they were all beautiful and were equals amongst each other.

What a beautiful life lesson for all young girls. That they should take care of their bodies, respect themselves, respect others, always be humble, and make a positive impact on the world. Isn't this a lesson that all mothers want for their daughters? To take pride in themselves and have a sense of confidence that they can truly do anything they want? That their goals can be achieved with hard work and determination. And that nothing should get in the way of their dreams. To stand up tall no matter where they go and be prepared for anything?

Although there were moments during the evening that I had to strongly remind my daughter not to kick the chairs in front of her or sit up and watch the show...at the end I could see she was inspired. And even more so when she expressed in the car that she was going to be Miss USA one day and that we should start 'getting ready for when she's a teenager'. We got home. She went upstairs, hung up her clothes, took a shower, brushed her teeth, and preformed all the 'grooming' tasks that we ask our kids to do with lots of prompting. Already the inspiration has set in. She's expressed more sweetly than I've ever heard her talk, unless she really really wants something, that she is practicing for the pageant....Thank you Miss. USA...I am a very grateful mom tonight and I hope your message gets across to many more young girls...

'Susan'

I remember the day my dear friend's seven year old daughter was diagnosed with type 1diabetes. Her mother was devastated, and her daughter's life would be forever changed. Coincidentally, her daughter was also one of my dancers at the studio. I learned very quickly how to make sure (lets call her Susan), Susan measured her blood sugar correctly and delivered the right amount of insulin through her pump that was connected to her body. I remember being so impressed by this seven year old who knew so much about her 'disease', the effects it had on her body, how to control it, and how to use all of this equipment (that she carries around with her in a back pack). Susan's knowledge of nutrition, diet, exercise, and leading a healthy life style was so amazing that I had her speak at a few of our studio events. Susan is someone to be impressed by.
Susan is also my eldest daughter's best friend. So, after a sleep over one night (at Susan's house-because she has to get up multiple times per night to check her 'sugar') I took the kids to breakfast. Susan ordered her meal beautifully. All clean, nutritious food. She even suggested to my daughter that she skip the unhealthy food and make a better food choice. Like I'd done so many times before, I watched Susan call her mom, tell her everything on her plate, including portions, and deliver the correct amount of insulin to her body. The conversation that took place after was inspiring.

"Susan, before you eat anything do you always have to go through this process? How does it make you feel? Before you put anything in your mouth...even a sample or a taste, you have to measure and adjust your insulin?"
The answers were clear. Before Susan puts anything in her mouth, even a bite size sample, she has to check her blood sugar, and deliver the correct amount of insulin to her body. NO EXCEPTIONS! Every single time...no matter the size. No matter the food. Susan goes through this process. And, she doesn't seem to mind. She's accepted that this is a part of her life. And instead of hanging her head low and frowning, she has gracefully risen to the occasion and decided to live a happy, productive life.

So, here is where my wheels begin to turn. If Susan, a seven year old girl, is so responsible with her body....then why aren't we? Why would we ever complain about logging our food, or skipping desert? Whats the significance of having to eat massive amounts of junk just because it's snowing outside? What do you think Susan would do? If a seven year old child takes such immaculate care of her body, while also having responsibilities in life, what is our excuse?
There isn't one.

There is no excuse to put trash in our bodies. There is no excuse not to reach all of our health and fitness goals. So, I'm giving myself a challenge for the next weeks. My body is "under construction". I'm going to be as diligent as Susan, well maybe not as diligent...but I am going to log everything I eat. I'm going to be accountable for everything, not just some things. And I'm going to pay more attention to my body and it's needs.

I am truly inspired by Susan. And I hope I can be as strong as she is.

Mommy thoughts....

After the first glass was finished, the cheap bottle of red wine didn't taste that bad after all. The room was warmer, my cheeks were flushed, and all those busy feelings were settling down. Yes, the week was coming to an end, the weekend was about to begin. I swear, Mondays should be a vacation day for all adults with children. Mondays should be Sunday's vacation. When you become a parent, you accept that your life will never be completely about you again. Your world, views, driving, everything changes. Suddenly, the world is much more full than it was the day before, and you unexpectedly care more about the little things then you did nine months earlier. You change, grow, and become a new you.
I never knew that I could love someone one as much as I do my child. I never imagined that such a love could exist. I never knew how much walking alone through the quiet isles of Target was a small valued treasure. How nice it was to watch something other than, "Cloudy with a chance of meatballs" over and over again. I took advantage of sleeping past 730am.
Then you look at the face of the love of your life, your child, and think, "weren't you just in diapers?", "When did you get so big?", and "What the heck are you wearing?", and most recently think, "She can't talk to me like that...hey, I say that...." And you think about your acquaintances whose children have grown and "flocked the nest" and what a foreign concept that is.
"Everyone is getting so big" starts to sink in.

Never, would I ever have cried at the opening of the Lion King before I had children. Nor would I imagine that I would demand the grocery clerk, "check in the back" when the store was out of my child's favorite cereal. The importance of a bed time routine and 8pm were foreign concepts.

I love my kids more than anything or anyone in this world. And although they sometimes drive me crazy, and will someday give me gray hairs, I couldn't imagine my life without them. The daily chaos that three children cause a single mother, in some ways, should be treasured. Because when they have "flocked the nest" and when the house is quiet again, and when a trip to Target becomes a chore rather than an escape, those will be the days when we look back and wonder how quickly the years have past.

My New Years resolution is to live in the moment. A concept I've tried to explain to my seven year old, and have found is way beyond her understanding. If we don't live in the moment, and we are constantly thinking about what the next moment will be, how can we truly enjoy the gifts we are given. May they be monetary, or something as simple as a quiet moment to ourselves, living in the moment makes each day better than the one before.

Liz Corah Case Study #1

Liz Corah and Studio-310
"Leap and the Net will appear"

Introduction

The wood floors creaked and the studio was still warm. It was late, maybe 10pm or so. Classes had ended hours ago, but there was still work to be done. Too much work to be completed in a single evening by one person. After teaching eight classes with 103.1 fever, and surviving the first day of business, it was time for Liz to go home and get some much deserved rest. But who could rest on a day like this? The day one of your dream comes true?
Slowly she walked to the end of the studio. Gym bag, coffee cup, folders and more in hand, she turned out the lights. She turned around to see the dark, quiet studio that hours ago, was filled with dozens of people at a time full of energy and excitement. The room now dark and quiet was still buzzing with energy. You could feel it vibrating in the walls. There was a sense of excitement in the air. Never had she imagined that so many people would share her vision and join her at her new studio. She paused and thought for a moment about all of the amazing faces that had passed through her doors that day.
Liz walked to the center of the dance floor to take a look around to make sure everything was as it should be. Too busy with classes, customers, phone calls, Verizon, ballet bar and equipment delivery, and a broken toilet, there was no room to express emotion or to let any of it sink in, or out. She stared around the room at the paintings she had hung on the wall, at the walls she had painted herself, at the sheer elegance of her dream having come to reality. And then she saw herself in the mirror, Business owner, dance/fitness studio owner, teacher, motivator, single mother of two, no family, no one to share any of this with but herself. Herself…who had saved for an entire for startup costs, and who had successfully paid herself back that very day. She…who had achieved a dream that others had told her she would never do. Her body felt weak, she dropped her belongings to the floor, covered her face and bawled her eyes out. Her knees buckled beneath her, she fell to the floor. Hands still over her face, heartfelt sobs ringing through the studio, tears flowing down her face, she cried. Crying, laughing, happiness, sadness, exhaustion, and excitement, it was all there. What other way was there to feel when you took a leap of faith, and the net appeared?

Background

Liz Corah has been dancing all her life. Dancing anywhere and everywhere there was space or an audience. Music or no, she was a day dreamer and could escape from the world in an instant. Raised by a single mother whose goals were not to care for her only offspring. Corah essentially raised herself, and her mother.
In her teen years, not having any money for dance tuition, Corah made a deal with a local studio owner. She would clean the studio for dance tuition. Every night the studio was to be swept, stocked, and ready for the start of business day. Dancers were to be checked in, messages taken, and basic day to day running of the studio were a few of her responsibilities. In exchange, she had unlimited access to the studio’s classes.
Often, ballet classes were very full. Corah’s instructor, because she was the “scholarship kid”, was sent to the center of the floor to learn and practice all of her barre work. She was given a stool to use just in case she was to lose her balance. In the end, she was the strongest dancer in the entire studio. In addition to school work, dance, participating in the school’s theatre department, she also had a part time job making smoothies at a local Jamba Juice.
The really remarkable part of this is that there was no parent guidance. Corah’s mother suffered from certain disabilities that kept her bed bound. There was no one to ever push her to achieve her goals, or support her achievements.
At 16, Corah purchased a small car for $2500, that she paid for by working at Jamba Juice. On the weekends, she would drive to L.A to take classes at Millenium and the Edge.
At 17 (and uncertified, you had to be 18), Corah integrated cardio hip hop into many San Diego 24hour fitness locations. Her paycheck said she was the janitor, and she made $8 per class.
Shortly after her wedding on November 9th 2002, Corah’s new husband was sent to Iraq. She would have her first baby alone in a San Diego Naval Hospital. Upon her husband’s arrival home, they were transferred to Bethesda Naval Hospital, right outside of Washington D.C.
Corah was soon hired at Fitness First Health clubs to introduce her Cardio Hip hop and cardio dance programs into their programming. It took off like wild fire! During this time, she became pregnant with her second child, completed an Associate in Science in one year flat, divorced her abusive husband and began to lay the foundation for the rest of her life. Feeling a sense of strength for having survived so far, she often found herself thinking “the sky is the limit.” Why not follow all of my dreams? What do I have to lose?

Professional Challenge

Soon, all of Corah’s classes at the local clubs were by reservation only. Members set their watches to make reservations the evening before her classes. A great accomplishment this was, but there was nowhere to move forward from here, Corah had hit a wall. There was little or no room for creativity and self expression, and Corah felt limited in what she could offer. She had always had a dream to own her own dance/fitness studio. This felt like the right time to begin working towards that dream.
In attempt to reach out to the community and gain exposure, Corah signed on as an independent contractor with the Montgomery county recreation department where she integrated Hip Hop dance, and other dance programs into their county wide programming. She soon began teaching at Local elementary schools after school programs, community centers, and private homes.
In 2007, Studio-310 was incorporated. With a back pack full of music and a stereo in hand, she began to rent space all over Montgomery county and advertise her programs. Advertising, and “selling herself” was not her strength. Word of mouth, flyering neighborhoods email lists, and attending local community events was her best form of advertising.

Personal Challenge

In November 2007, she signed a lease for a commercial store front property in a busy shopping center. Previously a Ladies workout express, the walls were purple, the carpet a pepto bismol pink. With the help of a friend, the carpet was pulled, hard wood floor layed down, and walls painted. In three short weeks, the studio was open for business.
In the midst of it all, Corah was also the single mother of two small daughters. There were many hours that had to be spent putting the studio together, lots of daycare, and a few babysitters. The idea of making her own hours so that she could spend more time with her children pushed her to work harder. Being a single mom meant being a double parent and she wanted to make sure she was in a position to gracefully and happily rise to the occasion. There was a tremendous amount of guilt that came into play when away from her daughters for so many hours at a time. Running a business with her own set hours would help to alleviate this guilt.
In addition to family balance, Corah was fulfilling her dream, creating a space where she could be creative, innovative, and grow. Dancing, teaching, and motivating are a large part that makes Corah who she is. This is what she identifies with; this is what makes her happy.
Though speed bumps were hit along the journey, as they are when starting a business, there has been much success in the past three years. Recently, Corah was named one of the “Women business leaders in Maryland” by the Gazette and featured in Crave D.C’s “top 100 women you need to know in the D.C/Metro area”. Local media has picked up on her efforts as well. CH9 news has listed Studio-310 as a featured business on their website, and Fox5 news has had Corah on air three times. In January, 2011 Corah will be a fitness presenter at the NBC4 Health and Fitness Expo at the D.C convention center. And to compliment all of this, Corah is raising a happy, healthy family in a new home in the neighborhood she has wanted to raise her children.

Discussion questions and answers


1. If you were Liz, and had limited time and capital to market a new business, what would be your three strategies?
2. If in the position of a single mother with two small children, do you think you would take a leap of faith, quit your secure job position and start a brand new business? If so, what would be your first step? How would you balance family and business? If not, explain why?
3. When starting a business and attempting to create a name for yourself in the community, would you consider signing on with another popular organization? Do you think this is a good marketing strategy?
4. If someone who you admire and respect said to you today, if you quit your job and follow your dreams, you will be successful. Would you believe them? Would you do what they asked?
5. Are you living the life you’ve imagined?

Trainer answer.....

"How do I keep from gaining weight and eating bad food during the holidays?..."

Remember....celebrate with people, not food. As hard as it is, just do it. And thats what it is...you just have to do it. Keep in mind your goals at all time. Before you eat something yummy thats on the desert table, ask yourself, "is this worth how I'm going to feel later?!" BUT....don't deprive yourself either. Instead of having a large slice of pie, have the serving you would give to your kids.
Drink plenty of hot tea and fluids to curve your appetite. Constantly remind yourself that you are worth the effort. And most of all, that no one will ever take care of your body the way that you will. Ever.
Be good to your body, and it will be good to you. You want to feel good from the outside in. You want to feel more energetic, happier, vibrant. High sugar foods, and all the crap we tell ourselves that we "have to eat" during the holidays is absolute poison for our bodies. Guess what happens to that apple pie you had? It turns into sugar, and then your body stores it as fat. It's that simple.
The holidays is a hard time for all of us to stick to our "diet". But it really doesn't have to be. There is absolutely no reason whatsoever, that we have to eat crap every day just because its November and December. You have to identify what the emotional connection is to the "holiday food". Does it make you feel happy, comforted? Bring back memories? Thats all wonderful and terrific and it's nice to have things to give us euphoric feelings. However, what is not wonderful and terrific or in any way euphoric is the way our jeans will fit later, or when we feel like "crap" from eating all the "crap" and we start our self destructive habits..."well, I'll eat what I want in December and then start a diet again in January." Its truly not worth the time and effort. It takes NOTHING to gain weight (fat), it takes everything you have, all of your will power and determination to get the weight (fat) off of your body.
Think about fat this way, the fat inside your body, specificlly in your torso/abdomen is essentially 'suffocating' your internal organs. All of that pressure from the adipose tissue (fat) is surrounding your major organs, your heart, your lungs....causing detremental, even life threatening disease/illness. That right there, not how you look naked (that comes later), should be the reason for picking healthy/nutritious foods that fuel your body, not hinder it.
So, how do I survive the holiday season? You just do. Pick a day, Christmas day for example, to have your favorite, comforting foods (all in moderation of course). Then be done with it. You will have had your holiday fix, and you will have saved yourself from days/weeks/months of self destruction.
Life is short, and we create the world we live in. So, why on earth would we chose to pollute our bodies with "food" that was never intended to be consumed? You clean your house, you service your car, you dry clean your clothes...but you feed your body trash?
On another note, take away all the guilt you may have when declining a holiday dish. Don't worry about hurting other people's feelings, or missing out. There is something to be said for someone who takes the time to nourish and take care of their body. Someone who values themselves and their body (you only get one) is someone to be admired. It's okay to say no.
Think about all the health problems that would'nt exist if we simply gave our body what it needs?
Again, your car is clean, serviced and runs beautifully....but your body is tired, weak, and you vow to "get to the gym", or "go back to weight watchers" in the New Year. Don't wait for January. Start now, and continue taking care of you every single day.

Happy Holidays.

Danielle

It was only yesterday that I had the rare opportunity to watch tv for 1/2 hour all by myself. The program of choice, "Life of Jenks" on MTV. A new series where a man travels all around the country experiencing things that most of us only read about. Yesterday, Jenks befriended a homeless girl named Danielle. He lived with her on the street for one week, experiencing everything she did on a daily/nightly basis. They slept on cement, sat on corners asking for change for food, and truly lived out of a grocery cart and a trash can.

All the questions that raced through my head, Jenks adressed. Why are you homeless? don't you think theres an easier way? Can't you get a part time job? Isn't there something better for you?

The root of Danielle's problem started at home. When her mother was asked, "how do you feel about your daughter living on the street?" Her shallow, alcholic, abusive, sorry excuse of a mother responded, "I'm okay with it".

So many thoughts swarmed through my head after watching this show. Sadly, we view documentaries like this often. Why did this one hit so close to home?

It's because when "Heavy D" or Danielle offered to share what she's discovered the meaning of life to be, she responded, "to be happy, to live each day fully, and to make the most out of everything." How could someone in her situation be happy? How could she live each day to the fullest? Why wasn't Danielle angry at the world? And why was she so optomistic about everything?

Well, if Danielle could do it, then I can certainly do it.

So I've decided to make some small adjustments in my daily thoughts and feelings.
Instead of worrying about how I'm going to juggle three things at once, I'm going to be happy that I have this beautiful life with these amazing opportunities to juggle.
Instead of whining about how crazy my kids are, I'm going to take pride in having given birth to three healthy, fantastic children.
Instead of moping because it's only 630am and I'm awake, I'm going to be greatful for the day ahead.
Instead of worrying because I only have enough milk for breakfast, I'm going to remind myself that some where out there is someone who can't afford food.
Instead of getting mad at loved ones, I'll be greatful that they are a part of my beautiful complicated life.
And like Danielle, I'm going to be happy, and make the most out of everything.

Workout in the Apple Orchard

Today I did squats. But not the tediously boring, well counted type of squat that you find at a gym or in a class. These were squats that happened unexpectedly, and happened often and have left my legs feeling strong, tight, and absolutely defeated.
Who, you ask, can defeat the quads of the local group instructor squat guru who preaches to her classes on a daily basis that we WILL have the best dearer on the block?....A 19 month old future Olympic sprinter in an Apple Orchard. Maybe it's in his blood? But I kid you not, it was a great workout.
We ran backwards, and forwards, and shuffled sideways to block a pass. He ran under the tree, I did a squat shuffle to keep up. Through the tree, back through the tree. An obvious game for him, and an unexpected cardio session for me.
Our workout not only included the constant sprints, jogs, and side shuffling squats, it also consisted of taking off into a sprint from a squatting position. You see, when Ethan decided he liked an apple, or pointed to one, I, being the tentative mother that I am, would squat down to pick his favorite fruit. After holding the squat for a few seconds, I would look up to see Ethan AT THE OTHER END OF THE ISLE, picking up a bruised, half eaten apple off the ground and moving it towards his open mouth. So there, from a squatting position, I would sprint to him. He would then drop the apple and run away at top speed cracking up with absolute joy.
In addition, to this 31 lb bundle of pure "boy" I was with my little beauties who were quietly climbing up trees picking the "perfect" apples with "no boo boos" and cracking up watching the workout unfold. Often, I was asked to "shoulder press" my five year old to the top of the tree to pick out an apple or two.
After about an hour of picking/running, and squatting, shoulder pressing, everyone decided it was time for lunch....everyone except Ethan who continued to sprint the opposite way that everyone was walking. It was pretty apparent that Ethan wasn't ready to "quit" or give up. He would look at you, ignore any call or signal that you wanted him to follow you, smile and turn around and sprint in the opposite direction. Out of desperation to compromise with Ethan and end our workout, I let his older sister run ahead of me with him while I had the Radio flyer wagon filled with lunches/drinks/blankets and a 5 year in my left hand and a wheel barrel full of ($50) apples (I obviously wasn't monitoring the cleaning out of the isle). Did I mention I was pulling and fast pace walking/jogging. It mustve absolutely been a sight to see. Once I reached the end of the Isle, he decided to crawl into the wheel barrel full of apples to do some sampling.....lucky....
For some reason, we decided to go to isle #21...the very last isle of apples at the orchard. The walk back to hay/picnic area was quite a distance away, and even then the hay was at the bottom of a hill....I seriously thought about offering a class like this at the studio. Would it be called, "Chase Liz's pre Olympic 19 month old sprinter for an hour non stop, shoulder press her Kindergartner, then carry two wheel barrels filled with children, groceries and apples uphill for 20 min"
I wonder if anyone would show up? What a great Sunday.....